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Re: The reality of depression - Decoded Magazine
@FL, the ranch was very sketchy looking to me and I really wanted to cancel our scheduled rides. That morning, as soon as I woke up, I had a whole conversation in my mind about Christopher Reeves (what the heck?) why? idk... I kept getting the advice to hold on, really hold on tight if anything happens. I don't know if I was being prepared for it or if my thoughts caused it... like I said, I'm kind of psychic, no joke. I didn't tell anyone about this, just went along. (I know better now.)
The horse and I were climbing a very steep ridge about 12 ft straight up with a sharp right turn on the top of the ridge & we were right behind our guide. I don't know what happened, really, because we'd been climbing shorter ridges all day and it was fine and really fun. We'd been loping and trotting in a field for about 1/2 hour beforehand, all really fun.
But this time, all I remember is my horse taking a few steps up the ridge & then I was taking flight off the saddle, and the words I'd heard earlier that morning in my mind "hold on as tight as you can" replayed. Then I felt what seemed like a semi ram me in the back so hard all I saw was white. Then, wham again. everything was white & felt like slow motion. I couldn't breathe and felt out of control completely. Then, wham a 3rd time. I said to myself "oh nooooo, one more time and I'm dead." and then he stopped. But I had no air to breathe, felt like every rib had been crushed honestly, and pain was radiating all through my back and shoulders, shocking pain really, and I have a very high pain threshold. Did he lose his footing and buck? Did he feel off balance and buck? Maybe he could make the right turn? I don't know. There were 4 people behind us on their horses and no one could say what happened.
I had to wait to catch my breath, then I kept asking "What went wrong?" and my instinct told me to get off that horse asap. But I didn't want to ruin the ride for anyone and we all walked to the ranch very slowly. I was sick the rest of the day, really sick.... and in shock emotionally. I think I was also dehydrated because it was a 3 hour ride in the hot sun starting at noon, so I downed 3 whole water bottles as soon as we reached the car. I'd also had a Benadryl beforehand because I'm allergic and that might have dehydrated me as well.
My husband kept telling me I needed an MRI the next day, but I didn't listen. I'm still really sore and it happened 10 days ago. My back hurts at night primarily, from hip to waist area, unless I stay perfectly still. It felt like such a close call I don't think I'll ever ride again, honestly. Horses are such powerfully strong animals. I just don't ever want to feel that again. I'm really glad I was able to hold on. I think I will see a chiropractor soon.
I was born with a dislocated hip and had to wear a leg/hip brace from ankle to waist when I was an infant for my first year. The brace kept my legs in a frog position and seeing me restricted like that made my mother very sad. lol The guide we were with was a surgical nurse and she said maybe that had something to do with the pain I felt (she asked me about my skeletal history), but I don't think so.
That's my scary bucking horse story! lol Thanks for asking. I'm very grateful I can still move around and didn't fall off. I take Aleve or Tylenol before I go to sleep and it helps alot. (I can't really handle any pain meds too well.) I'm more of an all-natural-type human. I've never been to a chiropractor & am I little hesitant to go. I know one thing, I do not want to be braced or I will have serious depression issues I think. (there, brought it back around to this thread. lol)
Your assessment of ms seems spot on. Will be watchful for a mood and stay away.
only human though
It does seem to me like some people have to wrestle everything to the ground here and kill it sometimes. what is up with that?
@FL, the ranch was very sketchy looking to me and I really wanted to cancel our scheduled rides. That morning, as soon as I woke up, I had a whole conversation in my mind about Christopher Reeves (what the heck?) why? idk... I kept getting the advice to hold on, really hold on tight if anything happens. I don't know if I was being prepared for it or if my thoughts caused it... like I said, I'm kind of psychic, no joke. I didn't tell anyone about this, just went along. (I know better now.)
The horse and I were climbing a very steep ridge about 12 ft straight up with a sharp right turn on the top of the ridge & we were right behind our guide. I don't know what happened, really, because we'd been climbing shorter ridges all day and it was fine and really fun. We'd been loping and trotting in a field for about 1/2 hour beforehand, all really fun.
But this time, all I remember is my horse taking a few steps up the ridge & then I was taking flight off the saddle, and the words I'd heard earlier that morning in my mind "hold on as tight as you can" replayed. Then I felt what seemed like a semi ram me in the back so hard all I saw was white. Then, wham again. everything was white & felt like slow motion. I couldn't breathe and felt out of control completely. Then, wham a 3rd time. I said to myself "oh nooooo, one more time and I'm dead." and then he stopped. But I had no air to breathe, felt like every rib had been crushed honestly, and pain was radiating all through my back and shoulders, shocking pain really, and I have a very high pain threshold. Did he lose his footing and buck? Did he feel off balance and buck? Maybe he could make the right turn? I don't know. There were 4 people behind us on their horses and no one could say what happened.
I had to wait to catch my breath, then I kept asking "What went wrong?" and my instinct told me to get off that horse asap. But I didn't want to ruin the ride for anyone and we all walked to the ranch very slowly. I was sick the rest of the day, really sick.... and in shock emotionally. I think I was also dehydrated because it was a 3 hour ride in the hot sun starting at noon, so I downed 3 whole water bottles as soon as we reached the car. I'd also had a Benadryl beforehand because I'm allergic and that might have dehydrated me as well.
My husband kept telling me I needed an MRI the next day, but I didn't listen. I'm still really sore and it happened 10 days ago. My back hurts at night primarily, from hip to waist area, unless I stay perfectly still. It felt like such a close call I don't think I'll ever ride again, honestly. Horses are such powerfully strong animals. I just don't ever want to feel that again. I'm really glad I was able to hold on. I think I will see a chiropractor soon.
I was born with a dislocated hip and had to wear a leg/hip brace from ankle to waist when I was an infant for my first year. The brace kept my legs in a frog position and seeing me restricted like that made my mother very sad. lol The guide we were with was a surgical nurse and she said maybe that had something to do with the pain I felt (she asked me about my skeletal history), but I don't think so.
That's my scary bucking horse story! lol Thanks for asking. I'm very grateful I can still move around and didn't fall off. I take Aleve or Tylenol before I go to sleep and it helps alot. (I can't really handle any pain meds too well.) I'm more of an all-natural-type human. I've never been to a chiropractor & am I little hesitant to go. I know one thing, I do not want to be braced or I will have serious depression issues I think. (there, brought it back around to this thread. lol)
Your assessment of ms seems spot on. Will be watchful for a mood and stay away.
only human though It does seem to me like some people have to wrestle everything to the ground here and kill it sometimes. what is up with that?
& can communicate to the soul in a certain way, as does meditation, help from caring people like Micko, physical activity, nature, brain therapies, and the right chemical balance. Souls are simple & complicated, strong & fragile.
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