A Joke for the day

[Kinetic]

So there was big orgy going on in the jungle...major bacchanalian stuff :
the elephant doing the monkey, the crocodile doing the giraffe, the ant with the hippo, the parrot with the hyena, the lizard bonking the rhino...you get the picture...

In the middle of this, king lion turns up and, seeing the mess going on, starts screaming :

- Guys, what the hell?!? Shit can?t be like that!!! You?ll end up ruining your animal nature, your species! From now on, either you f*** someone of your own kind, or at least do like the donkey, I mean at least he's wearing a condom and...

The donkey interrupts him and says :

- Yo, king! This ain?t a condom...it?s the rattlesnake giving me a blowjob.

[peloquin]

Re: A Joke for the day

2/10 man, nice try tho

[DJJEFFJONES]

Re: A Joke for the day

-5

[Kinetic]

Re: A Joke for the day

lol
yeah I guess it loses a lot of impact on translation.

[hansh20]

Re: A Joke for the day

it was good, i like it... i heard it on spanish, its funny though 7/10

[anonin]

Re: A Joke for the day

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, i thought it was so stupid its hilarious.

[groffhibbitz]

Re: A Joke for the day

so this guy comes home from work, to see his girlfriend packing up her things.

"where are you going" he says.

"I'm leaving you, Jon"

"what? Why?"

"I just found out, your a pedophile!"

To which he responds, "That's an awfully big word for a 10 year old!"

[maddlingo]

Re: A Joke for the day

so this guy comes home from work, to see his girlfriend packing up her things.

"where are you going" he says.

"I'm leaving you, Jon"

"what? Why?"

"I just found out, your a pedophile!"

To which he responds, "That's an awfully big word for a 10 year old!"

[anonin]

Re: A Joke for the day

haha, yea that one was pretty funny.

[CrazyMadFlyGirl]

Re: A Joke for the day

To all the pot heads who could relate, LOL....

A monkey is sitting in a tree smoking a joint, when a lizard walks past, looks up,and says to the monkey "Hey, what're you doing?" The monkey replies, "Smokin' a joint, come up and have some." So the lizard climbs up the tree, sits next to the monkey,and they smoke a few joints. After a while the lizard says his mouth is 'dry' and he's going to the river to get a drink. The lizard climbs down the tree and staggers over to the river to get a drink of water, but he is so stoned, he leans over too far and falls into the river. A crocodile sees this, swims over to the lizard and helps him to the side. Then he asks the lizard, "What's the matter with you?" The lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting up in a tree with a monkey smoking pot, got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink. The crocodile says he has to check this out, and wanders off into the jungle. He finds the tree where the monkey is sitting finishing up a joint. The crocodile yells up to the monkey and says "Hey!" The monkey looks down and says>>>>>"Fuuuuuuuuuuuck........Dude! How much water did you drink?!"

[DJJEFFJONES]

Re: A Joke for the day

so this guy comes home from work, to see his girlfriend packing up her things.

"where are you going" he says.

"I'm leaving you, Jon"

"what? Why?"

"I just found out, your a pedophile!"

To which he responds, "That's an awfully big word for a 10 year old!"

+5

[peloquin]

Re: A Joke for the day

groffhibbitz = saviour of this thread

[rubyraks]

Re: A Joke for the day

Italian Boy's Confession

Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a losse woman.

The priest asks, Is that you, little Johnny Parisi?

Yes, Father it is.

And who was the woman you were with?

I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation.

Well, Johnny, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you might as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?

I cannot say.

Was it Teresa Volpe?

I'll never tell.

Was it Nina Capeli?

I'm sorry but I cannot name her.

Was it Cathy Piriano?

My lips are sealed.

Was it Rosa Di Angelo, then?

Please, Father, I cannot tell you.

The priest sighs in fristration. You're very tight lipped, Johnny Parisi and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot attend church services for 4 months.

Now go and behave yourself.

Johnny walks back to his pew, and his friend Nino slides over and whispers,

What'd you get?

Four months vacation and five good leads...

[shosh]

Re: A Joke for the day

[DJJEFFJONES]

Re: A Joke for the day

Italian Boy's Confession

Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a losse woman.

The priest asks, Is that you, little Johnny Parisi?

Yes, Father it is.

And who was the woman you were with?

I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation.

Well, Johnny, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you might as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?

I cannot say.

Was it Teresa Volpe?

I'll never tell.

Was it Nina Capeli?

I'm sorry but I cannot name her.

Was it Cathy Piriano?

My lips are sealed.

Was it Rosa Di Angelo, then?

Please, Father, I cannot tell you.

The priest sighs in fristration. You're very tight lipped, Johnny Parisi and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot attend church services for 4 months.

Now go and behave yourself.

Johnny walks back to his pew, and his friend Nino slides over and whispers,

What'd you get?

Four months vacation and five good leads...

+100