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This is from another forum where these guys did HUNDREDS of pranks to Linksys technical support chat. Let me know if you want me to find more, I think they're pretty funny...
Ann (21367): Hi, my name is Ann (21367). How may I help you?
Unknown: ann
Unknown: are you a robot?
Ann (21367): No, I'm not.
Ann (21367): How may I help you?
Unknown: ok just making sure.
Unknown: they are everywhere you know
Ann (21367): Okay.
Unknown: k listen carefully
Ann (21367): Okay.
Unknown: if you put mayo on your linksys device will it get messed up?
Ann (21367): Yes.
Ann (21367): What is the problem you are experiencing with your Linksys product?
Unknown: cus my blind cousin was making sandwitches and he grabbed the router thinking it was a big peice of hard bread
Unknown: and he totally smeard the mayo on it
Ann (21367): Can you please confirm the model number of your Linksys product?
Unknown: k hold on ok
Unknown: is that ok with you?
Ann (21367): Thanks.
Ann (21367): Okay.
Unknown: before i check can you say yes instead of okay?
Ann (21367): Sure.
Ann (21367): Yes.
Unknown: the ninja that killed my dog was named ok
Unknown: okay*
Unknown: brb im gonna like check for that number thing
Ann (21367): I'm sorry about that.
Unknown: its ok
Unknown: i shot the ninja in his half penis
Unknown: wanna c pic?
Ann (21367): No, sir.
Unknown: k im checking now for sure
Ann (21367): How may I help you with your Linksys router?
Unknown: befsr41
Ann (21367): Thanks.
Unknown: like i said my cousin (who is blind) put mayo on it
Ann (21367): Is it working before?
Unknown: it got inside the little ethernet holes and everything
Unknown: it was working before
Unknown: brb
Unknown: im back
Ann (21367): How are you connected to the Internet right now?
Unknown: im on my moms computer
Unknown: its a laptop
Ann (21367): Where is it plugged in?
Unknown: its a wireless signal from my neighbors house
Unknown: *shhhh* dont tell my neighbor hto
Unknown: tho*
Ann (21367): Okay.
Unknown: OKAY?! POOR DOGGY!! wahhhhh
Unknown: ill get that ninja one day
Ann (21367): Can you please tell me the exact problem with your router , other than telling that your blind cousin poured mayo on it?
Ann (21367): Sorry again.
Unknown: well technically he didnt "pour" it
Unknown: it was more of a spreading motion
Unknown: well when i plug it in it screams sorta
Unknown: WHHEEERRRRRRR
Unknown: thats what it sounds like
Unknown: Do you type slowly, or are you just checking your spelling and stuff?
Ann (21367): I'm sorry.
Unknown: np, anyway what should i do?
Ann (21367): Well,technically, when you plug your computer to the router, can you still get connection?
Unknown: are you making fun of me?
Unknown: but no i cant
Unknown: it tries and tries but it jsut wont connect
Unknown: its like the little engine that COULDNT!!
Ann (21367): Where is your router right now?
Unknown: in my basement
Ann (21367): Connected to where?
Unknown: ITS NOT CONNECTED
Unknown: i told you it dont connect
Unknown: i put it down there so i dont cry for the waste of mayo
Unknown: and a router
Ann (21367): I mean physically connected to modem or anywhere?
Unknown: no its not
Unknown: want me to go get it
Unknown: ?
Unknown: well?
Ann (21367): Not for now.
Ann (21367): If you plug your computer to the modem, is it working?
Unknown: the computer or the router?
Unknown: i have to restart the computer when i plug it in cus its not used to so much mayo
Unknown: do you believe in the matrix?
Ann (21367): If you plug your computer to the modem, is it working?
Unknown: is what working
Unknown: the modem or the computer dosnt work
Unknown: should i kill my cousin ?
Ann (21367): Who is your ISP?
Unknown: who?
Unknown: i thought it was a number
Unknown: well im connected to sbc right now
Ann (21367): Internet Service Provider.
Unknown: they have really good service
Unknown: you never answered about the matrix
Ann (21367): Connected to SBC Global, but you told me that you're connecting to your neighbor ?
Unknown: yes but its wireless
Ann (21367): I'm sorry we don't answer non technical concerns.
Unknown: are you trying to make me look like a fool
Ann (21367): No.
Unknown: well is there anything you can suggest from the information i have gaveded you
Unknown: ?
Ann (21367): If you connect your computer to the modem, can you get on-line?
Unknown: no
Ann (21367): Then have your connection fixed first through the modem.
Unknown: oooo ok
Unknown: why the hell couldnt you tell me that earlier
Ann (21367): Because you're details are not complete.
Unknown: are you a virgin?
Unknown: jk that was inapropriate
Ann (21367): Do you have any other questions that I can help you with today?
Unknown: are you a virgin?
Unknown: i mean... is your router a virgin
Ann (21367): Stop it please Sir, if you keep on telling me your Linksys problem that way, I'll be be forced to disconnect this session.
Unknown: ok well thanks anyway
Unknown: how do you know im a sir
Unknown: are you stalking me?
Unknown: are you watching dr phil?
Unknown: this guy totally impregnated his chick while she was asleep
Ann (21367): Hi, my name is Ann (21367). How may I help you?
Unknown: ann
Unknown: are you a robot?
Ann (21367): No, I'm not.
Ann (21367): How may I help you?
Unknown: ok just making sure.
Unknown: they are everywhere you know
Ann (21367): Okay.
Unknown: k listen carefully
Ann (21367): Okay.
Unknown: if you put mayo on your linksys device will it get messed up?
Ann (21367): Yes.
Ann (21367): What is the problem you are experiencing with your Linksys product?
Unknown: cus my blind cousin was making sandwitches and he grabbed the router thinking it was a big peice of hard bread
Unknown: and he totally smeard the mayo on it
Ann (21367): Can you please confirm the model number of your Linksys product?
Unknown: k hold on ok
Unknown: is that ok with you?
Ann (21367): Thanks.
Ann (21367): Okay.
Unknown: before i check can you say yes instead of okay?
Ann (21367): Sure.
Ann (21367): Yes.
Unknown: the ninja that killed my dog was named ok
Unknown: okay*
Unknown: brb im gonna like check for that number thing
Ann (21367): I'm sorry about that.
Unknown: its ok
Unknown: i shot the ninja in his half penis
Unknown: wanna c pic?
Ann (21367): No, sir.
Unknown: k im checking now for sure
Ann (21367): How may I help you with your Linksys router?
Unknown: befsr41
Ann (21367): Thanks.
Unknown: like i said my cousin (who is blind) put mayo on it
Ann (21367): Is it working before?
Unknown: it got inside the little ethernet holes and everything
Unknown: it was working before
Unknown: brb
Unknown: im back
Ann (21367): How are you connected to the Internet right now?
Unknown: im on my moms computer
Unknown: its a laptop
Ann (21367): Where is it plugged in?
Unknown: its a wireless signal from my neighbors house
Unknown: *shhhh* dont tell my neighbor hto
Unknown: tho*
Ann (21367): Okay.
Unknown: OKAY?! POOR DOGGY!! wahhhhh
Unknown: ill get that ninja one day
Ann (21367): Can you please tell me the exact problem with your router , other than telling that your blind cousin poured mayo on it?
Ann (21367): Sorry again.
Unknown: well technically he didnt "pour" it
Unknown: it was more of a spreading motion
Unknown: well when i plug it in it screams sorta
Unknown: WHHEEERRRRRRR
Unknown: thats what it sounds like
Unknown: Do you type slowly, or are you just checking your spelling and stuff?
Ann (21367): I'm sorry.
Unknown: np, anyway what should i do?
Ann (21367): Well,technically, when you plug your computer to the router, can you still get connection?
Unknown: are you making fun of me?
Unknown: but no i cant
Unknown: it tries and tries but it jsut wont connect
Unknown: its like the little engine that COULDNT!!
Ann (21367): Where is your router right now?
Unknown: in my basement
Ann (21367): Connected to where?
Unknown: ITS NOT CONNECTED
Unknown: i told you it dont connect
Unknown: i put it down there so i dont cry for the waste of mayo
Unknown: and a router
Ann (21367): I mean physically connected to modem or anywhere?
Unknown: no its not
Unknown: want me to go get it
Unknown: ?
Unknown: well?
Ann (21367): Not for now.
Ann (21367): If you plug your computer to the modem, is it working?
Unknown: the computer or the router?
Unknown: i have to restart the computer when i plug it in cus its not used to so much mayo
Unknown: do you believe in the matrix?
Ann (21367): If you plug your computer to the modem, is it working?
Unknown: is what working
Unknown: the modem or the computer dosnt work
Unknown: should i kill my cousin ?
Ann (21367): Who is your ISP?
Unknown: who?
Unknown: i thought it was a number
Unknown: well im connected to sbc right now
Ann (21367): Internet Service Provider.
Unknown: they have really good service
Unknown: you never answered about the matrix
Ann (21367): Connected to SBC Global, but you told me that you're connecting to your neighbor ?
Unknown: yes but its wireless
Ann (21367): I'm sorry we don't answer non technical concerns.
Unknown: are you trying to make me look like a fool
Ann (21367): No.
Unknown: well is there anything you can suggest from the information i have gaveded you
Unknown: ?
Ann (21367): If you connect your computer to the modem, can you get on-line?
Unknown: no
Ann (21367): Then have your connection fixed first through the modem.
Unknown: oooo ok
Unknown: why the hell couldnt you tell me that earlier
Ann (21367): Because you're details are not complete.
Unknown: are you a virgin?
Unknown: jk that was inapropriate
Ann (21367): Do you have any other questions that I can help you with today?
Unknown: are you a virgin?
Unknown: i mean... is your router a virgin
Ann (21367): Stop it please Sir, if you keep on telling me your Linksys problem that way, I'll be be forced to disconnect this session.
Unknown: ok well thanks anyway
Unknown: how do you know im a sir
Unknown: are you stalking me?
Unknown: are you watching dr phil?
Unknown: this guy totally impregnated his chick while she was asleep
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