Joke of the day

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  • KinKyJ
    Platinum Poser
    • Jun 2004
    • 13438

    Joke of the day

    Mahmud Ahmadinejad, Iran's President, called President Bush, and told him: "George, I had a strange dream last night. I saw America, the entire country, beautiful landscapes, and all houses hoisting a flag with an inscription"

    "What did the text read?" Bush asked.

    Mahmud said, "Allah is God, Allah is Great".

    "You have to know Mahmud", Bush replied, "I'm very glad you called me. Last night, I had a similar dream. I saw the city of Tehran, magnificent! The city was renewed completely, and each residence hoisted a flag with an inscription too!"

    "What text did the flags carry?" Mahmud asked.

    "I don't know", Bush responded, "I can't read Hebrew!"

  • speciale
    Are you Kidding me??
    • Dec 2005
    • 3728

    #2
    Re: Joke of the day

    Originally posted by Miroslav
    It's not like he grabbed his balls and sucked his dick. It's not like he gave the Saudis the original copy of the Constitution to use as toilet paper. It's not like he gave away the secret recipe to the Colonel's chicken. .
    No Soup for You

    Comment

    • groffhibbitz
      Gold Gabber
      • Jun 2004
      • 632

      #3
      Re: Joke of the day

      knock knock

      Comment

      • KinKyJ
        Platinum Poser
        • Jun 2004
        • 13438

        #4
        Re: Joke of the day

        hoe'z thar?

        Comment

        • KinKyJ
          Platinum Poser
          • Jun 2004
          • 13438

          #5
          Re: Joke of the day

          (in the mean time)

          Donald Rumsfeld is giving the President his daily briefing.
          He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."

          "OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

          His staff sits in stunned silence--shocked at this uncharacteristic display
          of emotion -- nervously watching as the President sits slumped in his chair with his head in his hands.

          Finally, the President looks up and asks... "How many is a brazillion?"

          Comment

          • thesightless
            Someone will marry me. Hell Yeah!
            • Jun 2004
            • 13567

            #6
            Re: Joke of the day

            you know, i actually hear the crickets.
            your life is an occasion, rise to it.

            Join My Chant. new mix. april 09. dirty fuck house.
            download that. deep shit listed there

            my dick is its own superhero.

            Comment

            • KinKyJ
              Platinum Poser
              • Jun 2004
              • 13438

              #7
              Re: Joke of the day

              Britney brought her pets too?

              Comment

              • Weizy
                MCast Resident DJ
                • Jun 2004
                • 3174

                #8
                Re: Joke of the day

                i got a laugh out of both jokes

                Comment

                • MJDub
                  Are you Kidding me??
                  • Jun 2004
                  • 2765

                  #9
                  Re: Joke of the day

                  So a priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk into a bar.














                  Then the second guy walks in.
                  http://www.myspace.com/mjdubmusic

                  You can't have manslaughter without laughter.

                  "Son," he said without preamble, "never trust a man who doesn't drink because he's probably a self-righteous sort, a man who thinks he knows right from wrong all the time. Some of them are good men, but in the name of goodness, they cause most of the suffering in the world. They're the judges, the meddlers. And, son, never trust a man who drinks but refuses to get drunk. They're usually afraid of something deep down inside, either that they're a coward or a fool or mean and violent. You can't trust a man who's afraid of himself. But sometimes, son, you can trust a man who occasionally kneels before a toilet. The chances are that he is learning something about humility and his natural human foolishness, about how to survive himself. It's damned hard for a man to take himself too seriously when he's heaving his guts into a dirty toilet bowl."

                  Comment

                  • thesightless
                    Someone will marry me. Hell Yeah!
                    • Jun 2004
                    • 13567

                    #10
                    Re: Joke of the day

                    A Scotsman is sitting on a train across from a busty blonde wearing a tiny mini skirt.

                    Despite his efforts, he is unable to stop staring at the top of her thighs.

                    To his delight, he realises she has gone without underwear.

                    The blonde realises he is staring and inquires, "Are you looking at my growler?" "Yes, I'm sorry, " says the Scotsman and promises to avert his eyes.

                    "It's quite alright," replies the woman, "It's very talented, watch this, I'll make it blow a kiss to you."

                    Sure enough the growler blows him a kiss.

                    Wee Hughie, who is completely absorbed, inquires what else the growler can do.

                    "I can also make it wink, " says the woman.

                    The Scotsman stares in amazement as the growler winks at him.

                    "Come and sit next to me," suggests the woman, patting the seat.

                    The Scotsman moves over and is asked, "Would you like to stick a couple of fingers in?"

                    Stunned, The Scotsman replies, "Good grief! Can it whistle, too?"
                    your life is an occasion, rise to it.

                    Join My Chant. new mix. april 09. dirty fuck house.
                    download that. deep shit listed there

                    my dick is its own superhero.

                    Comment

                    • thesightless
                      Someone will marry me. Hell Yeah!
                      • Jun 2004
                      • 13567

                      #11
                      Re: Joke of the day

                      dirty jokes are like getting a gummer from betty white. so wrong, but feel great.
                      your life is an occasion, rise to it.

                      Join My Chant. new mix. april 09. dirty fuck house.
                      download that. deep shit listed there

                      my dick is its own superhero.

                      Comment

                      • groffhibbitz
                        Gold Gabber
                        • Jun 2004
                        • 632

                        #12
                        Re: Joke of the day

                        Originally posted by KinKyJ
                        hoe'z thar?
                        Jethroe.

                        Comment

                        • KinKyJ
                          Platinum Poser
                          • Jun 2004
                          • 13438

                          #13
                          Re: Joke of the day

                          Originally posted by groffhibbitz
                          Jethroe.
                          Seaaaaaaaaan, your redneck twin brother is here

                          Comment

                          • chanty
                            John, John, where art thou!
                            • Jun 2004
                            • 4622

                            #14
                            Re: Joke of the day

                            A blond woman speeding in a BMW is pulled over by a blond female cop. The policewoman asks her for her driver's licence.
                            "What does that look like?" she asks as she's digging through her purse.
                            "It's rectangular and small" says the cop.
                            The driver then pulls out a small mirror and looks in it and passes it on the the cop.
                            The cop says" Oh I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were a police officer too!"
                            Awww...I didn't mean A holes, as in "A holes"...I meant it like, as in, my friends....

                            Comment

                            • groffhibbitz
                              Gold Gabber
                              • Jun 2004
                              • 632

                              #15
                              Re: Joke of the day

                              No love. I'll finish it myself.

                              Jethroe who?

                              Comment

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