FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

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  • KinKyJ
    Platinum Poser
    • Jun 2004
    • 13438

    FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

    Every year the FBI is asked to investigate over 36,000 Serious Crimes including Suspicious Deaths and Homicides. And the Homicide Investigations Unit puts out its Top 11 Homicides of that year.

    1- Debby Mills-Newbroughton, 99 years old, was killed as she crossed the road. She was to turn 100 the next day, but crossing the road with her daughter to go to her own birthday party her wheel chair was hit by the truck delivering her birthday cake

    2- Peter Stone, 42 years old, was murdered by his 8-year-old daughter, whom he had just sent to her room with no dinner. Young Samantha Stone felt that if she couldn't have dinner no one should, and she promptly inserted 72 rat poison tablets into her fathers coffee as he prepared dinner The victim took one sip and promptly collapsed. Samantha Stone was given a suspended sentence as the judge felt she didn't realise what she was doing, until she tried to poison her mother using the same method, one month later.

    3- David Danil, 17 years old, was killed by his girl friend after he attempted to have his way with her. His unwelcome advance was met with double-barrelled shotgun. Charla's (the girlfriends') father had given it to her an hour before the date started, just in case.

    4- Javier Halos, 27 years old, was killed by his landlord for failing to pay his rent for 8 years. The landlord, Kirk Weston, clubbed the victim to death with a toilet seat after he realised just how long it had been since Mr Halos paid his rent.

    5- Megan Fry, 44 years old, is killed by 14 state troopers after she wandered onto a live firing, fake town, simulation. Seeing all the troopers walking slowly down the street Megan Fry had jumped out in front of them and yelled Boo! The troopers, thinking she was a pop up target, fired 67 shots between them, over 40 of them hitting the target. She just looked like a very real looking target, one of the troopers stated in his report.

    6- Julia Smith, 20 years old, was killed by her brother Michael because she talked on the phone too long, Michael clubbed his sister to death with a cordless phone, then stabbed her several times with the broken aerial.

    7- Helena Simms, Wife to the famous American nuclear scientist Harold Simms was killed by her husband after she had an affair with the neighbour. Over a period of 3 months Harold substituted Helena's eye shadow with a Uranium composite that was highly radioactive, until she died of radiation poisoning. Although she suffered many symptoms, including total hair loss, skin welts, blindness, and extreme nausea and even had an ear lobe drop off, the victim never attended a doctor's surgery or hospital for a check up.

    8- Military Sergeant John Joe Winter killed his two timing wife by loading her car with Trinity nitrate explosive (similar to C4). The Ford Taurus she was driving was filled with 750 kg of explosive, forming a force twice as powerful as the Okalahoma Bombing. The explosion was heard by several persons some up to 14 kilometres away. No trace of the car or the victim was ever found only a 55-meter deep crater, and 500m of missing road.

    9- Patty Winter, 35 years old, was killed by her neighbour in the early hours of a Sunday morning. Her neighbour, Flat Hame, for years had a mounted F4 phantom jet engine in his rear yard. He would fire the jet engine, aimed at an empty block at the back of his property. Patty Winter would constantly complain to the local sheriff's officers about the noise and the potential risk of fire. Mr Hame was served with a notice to remove the engine immediately. Not liking this he invited Miss Winter over for a cup of coffee and a chat about the whole situation. What Winter didn't know was that he had changed the position of the engine, as she walked into the yard he activated it, hitting her with a blast of 5,000 degrees, killing her instantly, and forever burning her outline into the driveway.

    10- Michael Lewis, angry with his gay boyfriend, used the movie, Die Hard with a Vengeance as inspiration. He drugged his boyfriend, Tony Berry, into an almost catatonic state, then dressed him only in a double-sided white board that read Death to all Niggers! On one side, and God Loves the KKK. On the other. Lewis then drove the victim to downtown Harlem and dropped him off. Two minutes later Berry was deceased.

    11- Conrad Middleton, 26 years old, was killed by his twin brother Brian after a disagreement over who should take the family home after their parents' passed away. Conrad had a nasal problem, and had no sense of smell. After the argument Brian stormed out of the house, then snuck back later, and turned on the 3 gas taps in the house, filling it with gas. He then left out a box of cigars, a lighter and a note saying, Sorry for the spree, have a puff on me, Brian. Conrad promptly lit a cigar, destroying the house and him in the process.
  • thesightless
    Someone will marry me. Hell Yeah!
    • Jun 2004
    • 13567

    #2
    Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

    Originally posted by KinKyJ
    What Winter didn't know was that he had changed the position of the engine, as she walked into the yard he activated it, hitting her with a blast of 5,000 degrees, killing her instantly, and forever burning her outline into the driveway.
    .
    i REALLY REALLY REALLY wanna see that
    your life is an occasion, rise to it.

    Join My Chant. new mix. april 09. dirty fuck house.
    download that. deep shit listed there

    my dick is its own superhero.

    Comment

    • GLD
      Gold Gabber
      • Apr 2006
      • 636

      #3
      Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

      good lord how can you blast up your wife with 750 kgs of explosives. i mean, just dump the bitch and shit on the table or sth.

      Comment

      • KinKyJ
        Platinum Poser
        • Jun 2004
        • 13438

        #4
        Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

        Originally posted by GLD
        shit on the table or sth.
        dayum you krauts are weird

        Comment

        • thesightless
          Someone will marry me. Hell Yeah!
          • Jun 2004
          • 13567

          #5
          Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

          Originally posted by GLD
          good lord how can you blast up your wife with 750 kgs of explosives. i mean, just dump the bitch and shit on the table or sth.
          if they can get away with some of the divorce rulings, then we can kill them with style
          your life is an occasion, rise to it.

          Join My Chant. new mix. april 09. dirty fuck house.
          download that. deep shit listed there

          my dick is its own superhero.

          Comment

          • max
            Are you Kidding me??
            • Jun 2004
            • 4864

            #6
            Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

            lol.. is this real? weher is it from? link?
            ...and yes, its a repost^^

            Comment

            • KinKyJ
              Platinum Poser
              • Jun 2004
              • 13438

              #7
              Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

              Comment

              • max
                Are you Kidding me??
                • Jun 2004
                • 4864

                #8
                Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

                thx for the fast reply..
                ...and yes, its a repost^^

                Comment

                • Localizer
                  Platinum Poster
                  • Jul 2004
                  • 2021

                  #9
                  Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

                  lol somehow the country with .au has this? and really no other site in the US does? sounds like a load of crock to me.
                  Many people would sooner die than think; In fact, they do so.
                  -Bertrand Russell

                  Comment

                  • KinKyJ
                    Platinum Poser
                    • Jun 2004
                    • 13438

                    #10
                    Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

                    Who gives a fuck? I had a good laugh with it

                    Comment

                    • Corven
                      Are you Kidding me??
                      • Jun 2004
                      • 4080

                      #11
                      Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

                      i must admit .. they were pretty funny
                      I broke my spoon on the viagra sundae.

                      Comment

                      • Lorn
                        Looking for a title!
                        • Sep 2004
                        • 5826

                        #12
                        Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

                        If the FBI had to investigate #1 I am going to stop paying taxes.

                        Forgive my ignorance but what does Darwin have to do with all this crap?

                        Comment

                        • KinKyJ
                          Platinum Poser
                          • Jun 2004
                          • 13438

                          #13
                          Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

                          ^^^ Darwin awards ring a bell?

                          Comment

                          • Garrick
                            DUDERZ get a life!!!
                            • Jun 2004
                            • 6764

                            #14
                            Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

                            2005's list of Darwin Awards... peoples' comments crack me up

                            Should I fuck you at that not until the ass, inject then tremendously hard bumschen and to the termination in the eyes yes?

                            Comment

                            • Lorn
                              Looking for a title!
                              • Sep 2004
                              • 5826

                              #15
                              Re: FBI's Top 11 deaths: who needs Darwin anyway?

                              Originally posted by KinKyJ
                              ^^^ Darwin awards ring a bell?
                              ah. Forgive my stupidity.

                              Comment

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