Women. can they b understood? *HELP*!

[MJ]

^^ now can you tell me something i don`t already know.

[Jibgolly]

"I've often wondered if i killed my wife while she's asleep, would anyone hear me?"
-jack handey

[YO75]

Re: Women. can they b understood? *HELP*!

How to shower like a woman

Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower, spray mould spots
with Tilex.

So true, Miss is always bangin on about it at me, you'd think the house would fall down if u didnt dry down tiles after......................

and as she's 8 months and 3.5 weeks pregnant, everything's a 100 fold, like her nesting instinct is on maximum overdrive and everything in the house has gotta be perfect, I think she's hoovering up approximately every 30mins, she's probably doing it right now

[Jibgolly]

get her some gardening classes.

[YO75]

Re: Women. can they b understood? *HELP*!

If I get hit with that 'too nice' shit one more time I'm gonna scream!

another good point, they have ago when your not nice enough and then when you go out with the lads you still get slagged off, its tight rope betwenn being caring, loving, manly and a bit of rebel................

personall I think there is no compromise, just except it that ur gonna upset the miss from time to time, so might as well carry on as normal, but just make the extra effort every now and then

[Terry]

Re: Women. can they b understood? *HELP*!

How to shower like a woman

Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry basket according to
whites and coloureds. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.


If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more
sit-ups.


Get in shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide
loofah and pumice stone.


Wash hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash
hair again to make sure it is clean.


Condition hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced with natural
avocado oil, leave on hair for 15 minutes.


Wash face with crushed apricot facial, scrub for 10 minutes until red.


Wash entire rest of body with ginger-nut and jaffa cake body wash. Shave
armpits and legs.


Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower, spray mould spots
with Tilex.


Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in
super absorbent towel.


Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.


If you see husband along the way, cover any exposed areas.


-------------------------

How to shower like a man


Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed leave in a pile.
Walk naked to the bathroom if you see wife along the way - shake willy at
her making woo-hoo sound.
Look at manly physique in the mirror, admire size of willy and scratch your
ass.
Get in the shower.
Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the
water rinse it off.
Make fart noises (real or artifical) and laugh at how loud they sound in
the shower.
Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash your
bum, leaving four pubes stuck on the soap.
Shampoo hair. Make shampoo Mohawk. Pee.
Rinse off and get out of the shower. Partially dry off.
Fail to notice water on the floor. Admire size of willy in mirror again.
Leave shower door open, leave wet mat on the floor, leave light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off
towel, shake your willy at her and make woo-hoo noise. Again.
Throw wet towel on bed.

thats priceless, i cant stoplaughing!!

[Pebbles]

Re: Women. can they b understood? *HELP*!

This is so funny reading this...but not all of us want a huge rock on our hand and want to mr. romantic.

A great guy:

simple, funny, independantly-minded, ... likes football (or some other sports) and can take you to a bar for a beer.

If it makes things easier I could always be an arrogrant prick if this is what the ladies want!

Girls that tell a guy he's too nice are either young and immature, or messed up in the head!!

[picklemonkey]

Girls that tell a guy he's too nice are either young and immature, or messed up in the head!!

Well, she was definitely a fucking psycho. When I look back on it I'm glad I'm not with her... even though she was hot as hell.

[Lets_party]

Re: Women. can they b understood? *HELP*!

If I get hit with that 'too nice' shit one more time I'm gonna scream!

another good point, they have ago when your not nice enough and then when you go out with the lads you still get slagged off, its tight rope betwenn being caring, loving, manly and a bit of rebel................

personall I think there is no compromise, just except it that ur gonna upset the miss from time to time, so might as well carry on as normal, but just make the extra effort every now and then

Exactly.... that's what I do

[Nick Sneddon]

Re: Women. can they b understood? *HELP*!

I've been thinking today that I've been given the runaround by 3 completely different girls in the past year/year and a half. I reckon I have 'please tread on me' written on my forehead, but only females can see it.........

[Weizy]

Re: Women. can they b understood? *HELP*!

To everyone who replied to this topic its fucking hilarious!

My own young advice, never try to understand, just say "yes" "thank you" "please" "okay" "whatever you say" "that looks great on you" and my all time favorite "should I just shut up about it".

That last one I use when its "that" time of the month... :wink:

[rubyraks]

Re: Women. can they b understood? *HELP*!

My own young advice, never try to understand, just say "yes" "thank you" "please" "okay" "whatever you say" "that looks great on you" and my all time favorite "should I just shut up about it".

That last one I use when its "that" time of the month... :wink:

^and any of these will eventually start to get you into the fight of "now you're just patronizing me" Good luck!



and although a bit late, the answer to the question this thread has posed is simply "NO"

but look at the bright side, they can't understand us either...so it's a bit of a fair tradeoff. The key to having a successful relationship is both partners realizing this and trying to overcompensate when possible :?

[hear_my_name]

u guys are funny.. 4 pages after, i dont think any of u still has a clue.. so just give up.. just be yourself.. and do things that u urself would appreciate when a girl would do it for u.. thats all .

[picklemonkey]

u guys are funny.. 4 pages after, i dont think any of u still has a clue.. so just give up.. just be yourself.. and do things that u urself would appreciate when a girl would do it for u.. thats all .

I don't give head.

[hear_my_name]

u guys are funny.. 4 pages after, i dont think any of u still has a clue.. so just give up.. just be yourself.. and do things that u urself would appreciate when a girl would do it for u.. thats all .

I don't give head.

ur funny.. is that the only thing u appreciate.. sometimes i think a guy just keeps a girl around if she gives great head.. or sumthing.. i dont think guys are in it for any emotional reasons..

does someone want to prove me wrong??