Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

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  • FM
    Wooooooo!
    • Jun 2004
    • 5361
    #1

    Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

    ...going out to a bar, having a couple drinks with the boys, scooching up next to the gorgeous but recently divorced 27 year old around 12:45am, buying a round of shots, miraculously convincing her to come home with you, taking 3 steps into your apartment, offering to take off her coat, standing behind her breathing softly on the back of her neck, lifting her hair up so you can put some gentle kisses on her shoulder, squeezing her tits real soft, getting her naked, flicking your tongue real nice along her clit, and then just when you see a trickle of pussywet BAM!!! SOME FUCKING BLACK GUY WITH A 13" x 3" PENIS COMES OUTTA NOWHERE AND FUCKS THE SHIT OUT OF THAT PUSSY!! AND WHAT DO YOU DO?? YOU STAND IN THE FUCKING CORNER AND JERKOFF AS YOU CRY YOURSELF TO SLEEP, THAT'S WHAT YOU DO.



    read this elsewhere...
    FM

    "Nowadays everyone is a fucking DJ." - Jack Dangers

    What record did you loose your virginity to?
    "I don't like having sex with music on- I find it distracting. And if it's a mix cd- forget it. I'm stopping to check the beat mixing in between tracks." - Tom Stephan

    Download/Listen To My Mixes
    Facebook!
    A Journey Into Sound On MCast

    Satisfaction guaranteed, or double your music back.
    Tags: None
    • Simon Preston
      Gold Gabber
      • Jun 2004
      • 845
      #2
      Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

      http://soundcloud.com/simonpreston/simon-preston-summer-2011

        Comment

        • DragonFire
          Addiction started
          • Dec 2004
          • 359
          #3
          Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

          spot on ... lol
          Don't Immitate ... Innovate

            Comment

            • ddr
              DUDERZ get a life!!!
              • Jun 2004
              • 7006
              #4
              Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

              LOL. you got the full dimensions of his penis too, classic. rofl
              "pics or stfu" - R.I.P. Steve "Jibgolly" James

                Comment

                • lilsensa
                  DUDERZ get a life!!!
                  • Jun 2004
                  • 6675
                  #5
                  Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                  RIP ~ Steve James







                    Comment

                    • KinKyJ
                      Platinum Poser
                      • Jun 2004
                      • 13438
                      #6
                      Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                      LMAO, that's so spot on!

                      Then again, black guys don't have shit on me

                        Comment

                        • 88Mariner
                          My dick is smaller
                          • Nov 2006
                          • 7128
                          #7
                          Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                          Originally posted by KinKyJ
                          LMAO, that's so spot on!

                          Then again, black guys don't have shit on me
                          and all along i thought the alfa romeo was compensating for your small penis
                          you could put an Emfire release on for 2 minutes and you would be a sleep before it finishes - Chunky

                          it's RA. they'd blow their load all over some stupid 20 minute loop of a snare if it had a quirky flange setting. - Tiddles

                          Am I somewhere....in the corners of your mind....

                          ----PEACE-----

                            Comment

                            • KinKyJ
                              Platinum Poser
                              • Jun 2004
                              • 13438
                              #8
                              Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                              Hahahaha, it's an Alfa, not a Corvette or a Hummer

                                Comment

                                • Kat
                                  A pretty fn good milkshake
                                  • Mar 2006
                                  • 4695
                                  #9
                                  Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                                  getting a shitty car doesn't guarantee the size either
                                  ♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪• אין סוף •♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•

                                  Music is essential for the expression of non material ideals and energies. Music colors our surroundings with emanations from the highest vibrational fields. It allows us to escape all limitations in our thinking and very existence.


                                    Comment

                                    • KinKyJ
                                      Platinum Poser
                                      • Jun 2004
                                      • 13438
                                      #10
                                      Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                                      Awww shaddap, you only drive a beemer because it's the only way to get something powerful between your legs

                                        Comment

                                        • Kat
                                          A pretty fn good milkshake
                                          • Mar 2006
                                          • 4695
                                          #11
                                          Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                                          the real power would indeed be Aston
                                          ♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪• אין סוף •♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•♫♪•♪♫•

                                          Music is essential for the expression of non material ideals and energies. Music colors our surroundings with emanations from the highest vibrational fields. It allows us to escape all limitations in our thinking and very existence.


                                            Comment

                                            • jeffrey collins
                                              Not cool enough
                                              • Jun 2004
                                              • 7427
                                              #12
                                              Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                                              Originally posted by Katkich
                                              getting a shitty car doesn't guarantee the size either

                                              That's why I wanna get a MINI. that way I can mess with people's minds.
                                              Jeffrey Collins: Painter
                                              My Painting Blog

                                              http://soundcloud.com/jeffreycollins
                                              My Soundcloud page.

                                                Comment

                                                • alexfish333
                                                  Gold Gabber
                                                  • Jul 2004
                                                  • 966
                                                  #13
                                                  Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                                                  Holosound@Vertigo in Costa Rica Streaming Video and Audio http://livestream.com/urbanettv/vide...8-c5911280cf91




                                                  Part of the weekend never dies...

                                                    Comment

                                                    • lucid
                                                      Fresh Peossy
                                                      • Jan 2006
                                                      • 23
                                                      #14
                                                      Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                                                      lol, not always true.. but funny nonetheless.

                                                        Comment

                                                        • Morgan
                                                          Platinum Poster
                                                          • Jun 2004
                                                          • 2234
                                                          #15
                                                          Re: Being An Opening DJ Is Like...

                                                          Originally posted by KinKyJ
                                                          LMAO, that's so spot on!

                                                          Then again, black guys don't have to shit on me, but I like it when they do.
                                                          "Pain is only weakness leaving the body."

                                                            Comment

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