A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

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  • pipey
    Gold Gabber
    • Mar 2007
    • 855

    A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?



    Toward a Framework for Christian Porn
    It must depict only married couples engaging in sexual acts. This means that any sexual partners in a Christian porn production must be husband and wife, both on and off screen. All actors must be married in real life and portray married couples onscreen. And they must only be depicted having sex with their wedded spouses.

    It must portray sex within the context of a Christian marriage. It must be apparent through the actions, behaviors, and speech of the characters portrayed that they are Christian, lead a Christian lifestyle, and have a marriage in which their faith is central. This could be depicted in a variety of ways, with scenes showing a couple praying together, studying the Bible, attending church or church functions, and generally relating to one another as loving Christian spouses outside of the bedroom.

    It must be instructional. Part of the mission of Christian pornography is to graphically educate married believers in how to achieve more sexual pleasure, intimacy, and closeness in their relationships. It can do this by dramatizing various sexual techniques and positions so that couples can learn how to incorporate them into their lovemaking routines. In their onscreen roles, the actors should model both correct sexual techniques and appropriate sexual attitudes, by being respectful and treating one another’s bodies as the sacred gift from God that they are.

    Husband and wife must both receive their due benevolence. This is in keeping with the scriptural mandate of I Corinthians 7:3, which says “Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.” This means that both sex partners must be shown getting equal pleasure and sexual attention from one another.

    No extramarital sex, unless it is to illustrate the downfalls of adultery. The spouses in a Christian porn production must never have adulterous relations, unless they (and their partner in extramarital crime) suffer and are punished fittingly for their sins. (In deference to modern conventions, the punishment does not have to be one mandated by scripture, i.e., being stoned to death.)

    It must be uplifting and inspirational, focusing on strengthening Christian marriage and Christian faith. Christian porn must have an overall positive message. Of course, its primary message would be to demonstrate the sacred use of sexuality and sensuality to reinforce the bonds of Christian marriage. But in all other respects, it should affirm Christian values of community, family, faith, honesty, charity, and so forth. It should show that having a joyous and fulfilling married sex life is one of the fruits of following the path of righteousness.

    No profanity. Although exclamations of pleasure are acceptable, as are the natural sounds and vocalizations of lovemaking, Christian porn should contain no profanity or swearing. The participants should address each other lovingly and respectfully at all times. Of course, it goes without saying that the actors will not take the Lord’s name in vain, nor that of his Son.

    Oh my fuck. these guys are serious.

    Cos i know whenever i watch porn, i always think "i hope these two are married"

    weird.
    Originally posted by Kamal
    Thank you Dr. Needle for attending the balloon Party
  • Dhar_2
    meat and potatoes
    • Jun 2004
    • 18919

    #2
    Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

    Originally posted by pipey
    Cos i know whenever i watch porn, i always think "i hope these two are married"

    Comment

    • DIDI
      Aussie Pest
      • Nov 2004
      • 16845

      #3
      Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

      ^^^
      Originally posted by TheVrk
      it IS incredible isn't it??
      STILL pumpin out great set after great set...never cheesed out, never sold out, never lost his touch..
      Simply does not get any better than Hernan
      The 'club spirit' is in the soul. It Never Dies

      Comment

      • coliver1980
        Platinum Poster
        • Aug 2008
        • 1862

        #4
        Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

        LOL!! Madness!!

        Comment

        • AndyH
          Platinum Poster
          • May 2005
          • 1786

          #5
          Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

          I would rather just have a wank..





























          Oh wait...
          [quote=lilsensa '] 'Who wants to sample size my ball sack?'

          Comment

          • i!!ustrious
            I got some N64 Games Yo!!
            • Mar 2008
            • 12308

            #6
            Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

            (((( }-d|-__-|b-{ ))))

            Comment

            • Dhar_2
              meat and potatoes
              • Jun 2004
              • 18919

              #7
              Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?


              Comment

              • AntonyM
                DUDERZ get a life!!!
                • Oct 2004
                • 6415

                #8
                Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

                You shall suffer for that threesome, on your knees and beg for forgiveness and while you are down there.......
                Originally posted by Shpira
                So came back last night...
                Sven Vath was amazing...he played a god damn killer set...ended up going to that and came to at like 10 am in some whore house in south Amsterdam...no idea how I ended up there...friday was a bit of a blur got really drunk and visited several parties can't remember a whole lot to be honest hehe...saturday was probably the best day that I recall...started up in the nearest coffee shop and going from party to party...beautiful woman, beer and weed...finished the night by taking some shrooms and listening to an amazing elke kleijn set...sunday...i met a nice girl who worked at one of the coffee shops and ended up talking to her for like 6 hours...was supposed to meet her at some DnB party...but instead went for a steak and walked around red light district bars drinking and smoking...monday took it easy went to a coffee shop and took a taxi to airport....

                All in all...I think I will be going back there some time soon
                Originally posted by Illuminate
                Let me get this straight.

                So white-middle class Americans have been told by their Television sets to be fearful of:

                1. Mexicans/Latinos from the South bringing drugs and killings n' shit.
                2. African Americans cause mos def they are raging a race war and want to occupy America like how the plebs occupied Wall St.
                3. Iranians/Afghans/Any one of middle eastern origin to be quite frank, cause you know Islam...
                4. North Koreans/Chinese cause you know everything...

                Am I close here?

                Comment

                • Shpira
                  Angry Boy Child
                  • Oct 2006
                  • 4969

                  #9
                  Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

                  it must be a joke of some kind there is even a page about fisting...LOL
                  The Idiots ARE Winning.


                  "Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect."
                  Mark Twain

                  SOBRIETY MIX

                  Comment

                  • simonr
                    Transitionator
                    • Jun 2004
                    • 8796

                    #10
                    Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

                    sigpicSimonR

                    This release was mastered direct from vinyl at the request of the DJ and as such features natural sound characteristics of this medium such as record surface noise.

                    Comment

                    • simonr
                      Transitionator
                      • Jun 2004
                      • 8796

                      #11
                      Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

                      sigpicSimonR

                      This release was mastered direct from vinyl at the request of the DJ and as such features natural sound characteristics of this medium such as record surface noise.

                      Comment

                      • Bender420
                        Tickle me Elmo!
                        • Jun 2004
                        • 1512

                        #12
                        Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

                        next they'll have a christian version of youporn.
                        porn and scripture, i can't wait!!!
                        Don't let anyone drive you crazy when you know it's in walking distance.


                        "some things simply aren’t meant to be bootybumped. Hard liquor is a prime example, as it will burn like a motherfuck."

                        Comment

                        • DIDI
                          Aussie Pest
                          • Nov 2004
                          • 16845

                          #13
                          Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

                          Originally posted by simonr


                          Funniest I've seen is the porn version of Thunderbirds.
                          Originally posted by TheVrk
                          it IS incredible isn't it??
                          STILL pumpin out great set after great set...never cheesed out, never sold out, never lost his touch..
                          Simply does not get any better than Hernan
                          The 'club spirit' is in the soul. It Never Dies

                          Comment

                          • Miroslav
                            WHOA I can change this!1!
                            • Apr 2006
                            • 4122

                            #14
                            Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

                            "oh God.....oh God...... OHHH MY GODDDDD"





                            "Bless you, my child."
                            mixes: www.waxdj.com/miroslav

                            Comment

                            • srbbnd
                              Platinum Poster
                              • Jul 2005
                              • 1088

                              #15
                              Re: A guide to Christian Porn??? Seriously, WTF?

                              Nice find
                              www.bestfilmsofthe20thcentury.com/

                              www.forwardthinkingproduction.com/

                              Comment

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