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I had a Christmas holiday once that felt as if I was walking on air with a smile that never left my face & saturated my soul, and everything in the world was shiny/new, miraculous and full of hope.
I think it's different for everybody. But for me, we had been dating for 3 yrs, she moved across the country with me. My Mom really liked her, and I felt in my heart that she was extremely loyal, patient, kind-hearted and loved me. Interestingly, when my wife and I first met, initially, I was extremely attracted to her, in a way I had never felt before in my life. It didn't feel like she was exactly what I had in mind as far as her personality, at first though. But we grew closer and I think 4 yrs is a good number for being together before marriage. But everyone is different.
CircleUp when you're with "the one" you can't fathom them not being just that. They say "you'll just know" and that was accurate for me; didn't have to ask anyone's opinion. I knew the minute he put his arm around me.... Felt like I'd been on a long journey and found home, with a deep inner peace I hadn't known with anyone else before, like an inner sigh of relief. And there was something about his presence that electrified me inside, unlike normal attraction. My feelings, preferences, goals... all really matter to him... something I hadn't ever experienced with anyone else before, not even my parents. We used to joke there really felt like 'birds of happiness' singing around us when we were together, things seemed poetic, it was very noticeable to both of us & different feeling. Can't really describe it better than that.
I wouldn't recommend just acquiescing to it and hoping it's right. When it's right, there's no denying it's right. I watched my dad acquiesce to the power of women (when deep down he knew there were issues & differences he couldn't handle); he'd just "go along" with marriage because it seemed like the thing to do, like "why not? & she's really pretty" & he didn't want to be alone. Can't say I ever saw him happily married & he was divorced 3 times. Go for the gold!
Also, a key sign of true love is that love spills out into everyone who knows them because it grows, expands, changes, morphs over time; it's apparent to you & touches others; it's always expanding inward and reaching [or running over] outward; radiating loving kindness to others ... because that's the whole point of it. That's how you know it's not just infatuation/lust with self-serving intentions. imo
While we are on the subject.... when I was in my teens.. people used to say ... "if fireworks go off in your head when you first kiss, then you know that person is the one" I seriously thought they were joking... until it happened to me...lol
That being said... 6 years of being married... and 9 years of being together is a different story.. people change, people grown, you live and you learn. There will plenty of hard times and down times but always respect each other first and your love will grow. I have a completely different understanding and appreciation for my hubby today than when we first met.. don't get me wrong, there are days when I still want to kill him
Timely comment Dusky, my wife and I celebrate 5 years of marriage today, 9 year together total as well . She's happy, healthy and loves me, and I couldn't really ask for anything more . We have learned a lot, come a long way as well. For me, and probably most men, we have to keep things simple in order to understand them. And that means making sure I always treat my wife with at least the same if not more respect as I give my friends. If we aren't nourishing the friendship, then the love just won't be there. Took me a while to figure that out, also took a lot of work in the career dept, moving cross country, making new friends, new career, buying a house, 2 cars and a dog... but we made it out alive and happy , so I am extremely grateful.
it IS incredible isn't it??
STILL pumpin out great set after great set...never cheesed out, never sold out, never lost his touch..
Simply does not get any better than Hernan
"Your soul mate is not someone who comes into your life peacefully. It is who comes to make you question things, who changes your reality, someone that marks a before and after in your life. It is not the human being everyone has idealized, but an ordinary person who manages to revolutionize your world in a second." -Anonymous
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