Better than fmylife

[Homegrove]

http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/

[Homegrove]

Re: Better than fmylife

(601): How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
(31: Alcohol?
(601): Sex with a fat chick.

[floridaorange]

Re: Better than fmylife

"I dont' make mistakes, just understandable bad choices."

[DIDI]

Re: Better than fmylife

14): ? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
(773): jesus mom

My face is hurting from laughing

[nick007]

Re: Better than fmylife

(717): dude, she has braces
(240): i meant the dude w the ponytail.
(717): i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.

[nick007]

Re: Better than fmylife

(303): How was Boulder?
(720): We're still here. We can't find _____.
(303): How'd you lose him?
(720): He ate a bag of Molly, wondered off, and keeps calling saying he's at the zoo feeding the tigers
(720): The zoo is 60 miles away and we called just to be sure - they don't let people feed the tigers

[Dhar_2]

Re: Better than fmylife

(405): Yeah, i think she was German or something.
(1-405): No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.

[Dhar_2]

Re: Better than fmylife

(214): your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
(1-214): we're not divorced.

[Dhar_2]

Re: Better than fmylife

(323): i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
(81: she hot?
(323): i don't wanna talk about it

brilliant!

[DIDI]

Re: Better than fmylife

That was a good one

[nick007]

Re: Better than fmylife

Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzeeeeeedddddd

[Homegrove]

Re: Better than fmylife

(850): Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
(850): I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife

[Homegrove]

Re: Better than fmylife

(321): Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
(1-321): he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
(321): no his phone, idiot.

15-20 minutes?

Man he's got bad porn.

[spyros]

Re: Better than fmylife

some quality texts there

[Johnnyboy]

Re: Better than fmylife

(847): this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way



(443): So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka

hahahahaha